On romance.

New post on tumblr. A few pages from my sketch book as well as a statement about where I am at right now with my project.

nicolelariviere.tumblr.com

Genius Loci & Memory

Can memories, the importance and significance of an object(s) gathered in a specific place be felt or seen by others?

Like when you enter a place of worship, you know that everything is special. You feel a vibe even if it isn't necessarily important to you. (the spirit of the place)
or, when you enter a place you thought was abandoned you know when someone lives there even with the least evidence, there is an essence a spirit, again if you will? Right?
- Can you see the spirit of a place? (Auroras?) or is that just in people...
- Is this Genius Loci again?

"The prevailing character or atmosphere of a place.
      - The presiding god or spirit of a place."   [Apple Dashboard Dictionary]

A Side Project

Can a town be mapped out with color, based on feelings for a place? Black for negative feelings and then a gradient to maybe a redish color like salmon for the happiest of places?
This all seems silly.
I think I want to map out two towns that I'm close to with colors defining character/atmosphere from my perspective... If not colors maybe make an icon set and place them accordingly on the maps.
Icons for Safe, Free, Memory, Comfort, and Love(healthy relationship *sexual or not*).... Wherever there are more populated areas of these icons should show where I feel most at home.

I'm glad to see these thoughts coming full circle to the idea that home is made of memories and memories can make up the spirit of a place, the history... (something everyone carries is history)

Juxtaposing Memory

My Current Car And Fragments of My Former Home

Inside My Dwelling, I Can See My Home So Far Away

A Bit of What I Lost:

- A fouton given to me by my step mom and my dad that we've had as far back as I can remember.  From Halloween night pictures from '98 to nights in college with my first love as well as other various purposes it served.- A curling iron plated with 24k gold, a gift from my step mother, we used to hardly get along, it meant a lot to me.- A Family photograph from 1994, a photo of my mother I will NEVER be able to replace, a Family I will never physically have ever again.- Vintage photos of my mother and father in the late 80s (about my age now 20s)- A cheap black bookshelf from either target or IKEA, but, it was my late step uncle Eddie's once... and a few of his trinkets and statues, now lost to the trash.- two pieces of a bedroom set (Solid cherry I believe... an armoire and night stand) which to my understanding was a wedding gift to my father and mother.)- Every piece of my original negatives and prints (photography)- A couch, a coffee table, and an end table I worked my ass off for just so I could have my first living room.- Any piece of art I made in the last three years except my portfolio which I luckily kept in my vehicle.- letters from friends who studied abroad and some letters written from the heart by an old boyfriend who served in the army... Journals and diaries too.- Trinkets and keepsakes kept in the top drawer of my nightstand since I was 3 or 4 years old... including a lipgloss set with lip gloss set in and flavored as fruit, orange, grape, cherry, strawberry, peach, and maybe one more...

There are many more things, things that I will never forget.  Each held a memory inside of it, a visual reminder of a story to tell. But, I'm learning thats all that they were, visuals of memories that no one can truly take from me. Memories of my own life, that no object can truly stand for.

To Truly Make A Home:
you must be able to have nothing, but still surround yourself with the memories you hold dear and once kept in the physical objects.

- Family  

- Love 

- Security 

- Safety 

- Independence 

- Freedom 

- Expression  

I still have all this, just not physical reminders, none of these things are physical.  The non-physical is much more descriptive, more relatable by a larger group, where the idea of home truly interconnects with everyone as these ideas become relative. The idea of calling a place home is truly poetic.


Home 002
So palpable
yet intangible.
Grand color manifests
not long after
an epic journey.
Traversing roads
looming with fog.
The greedy ground long
and consuming.

So deceivingly clear
this path on golden days.
Easy to drown,
easy for cries to escape sound.
Difficult to brave the risk,
difficult to survive the trek
time and time again.

Grand color manifests
not long after
an epic journey.

Okay, I caved.

I made a tumblr to keep a log of my own for my project. I'll post a link here to my posts as I do so. Here it is for now: http://nicolelariviere.tumblr.com/

My design seminar blog is here.

Every time I make a post I'll link it here.

Loss Of Home

From my journal:

Homes can be destroyed by emotional conflict, insecurity, loss in any form, and nature itself. 

"one might be lost or helpless, or racked with ontological [the nature of being] anxiety; but one could try, at least, not to be obtuse." [annoyingly insensitive/blunt]

Home 001 [draft] 

As easy as we call a place our home,
The elements can wreak havoc 
remind us we have nothing at all
to find a place within ourselves
To move freely and not stake a particular claim.
To belong only to ourselves and nothing belong to us.
To not simply take her
To do so, invites her to revoke our self awarded kingdom.
mercilessly. 

Yesterday 
I was feeling rather hopeless.  This past saturday on September 15th 2012, I had to part with 90% of my possessions. I was able to keep my clothing, and linens, but I did not even want those.  They felt useless.  Everything I achieved and everything I retained ripped from my hands, my material trophies... I've learned they are all nothing. Today, Alexa shared this quote from her blog: 

"Certainly a man of understanding has lost nothing, if he has himself. What can be salvaged from the shipwreck of existence proves to be not a possession withdrawn, in whatever way, into interiority but rather the self-possession achievable through the process of self-discovery and self-appropriation."  

-What The Shipwrecked Person Is Left With, pg. 14

I'm not the first to come to this sobering conclusion, clearly. We ignore loss in our society, we replace and replace and replace. I'll never forget when we saw the infestations as we opened the dvd cases, running everywhere.  The whirlwind of the calamity and hilarity, my grandfather wanting to see them, the unavoidable tears and pain, and in the end my father and my grandfather pulling out their wallets shoving their cash into my hands. I hardly cared. I hardly wanted what I had left. I didn't even want their hugs. I wanted to wash myself away in my tears.

As I was reading my book Available Light by Clifford Geertz yesterday (Sunday) I came upon the quote at the top of the page. With that I realized that I am not the only one to lose it all. People lose things often more than once!...

Home is remembered.
When one talks about home, their dialogue is filled with memory. Memory is weightless and can be taken no matter where you go and no one can take it from you.

 "The atmosphere of this room is in solidly linked with my idea of a kitchen."
 "Memories like these contain the deepest architectural memories."

- [insert architecht's name and book title here] 

The memory of the home you had, or the places you felt home become the ideas that you take to create your own version of home, physical or not. Some ideas are universal;

- Safety
- Security
- Control/Lack Thereof
- Respect

and so forth but, others are based on individual or similar materialistic memories...

Home 001

As easy as we call a place our home, 

she can wreak havoc 

and remind us; 

That we have nothing at all

to move freely 

and not stake a particular claim.

To belong only to ourselves

within ourselves

and nothing belong to us.

To simply take her,

gluttonously,

invites her to revoke our self awarded kingdom.

Mercilessly.